It’s hard to worship when you conduct worship. But I find that the repetition of the story in Holy Week in the end always ‘gets to me’
This year there were three …
The first was actually in Passiontide – early morning worship in the Chapel at St Andrews House, the Anglican Communion Offices in London. I was with the staff group who are a remarkably talented and very international community of people. ‘Which part will you sing?’, I was asked on the way in. So we sang ‘When I survey … ‘ without accompaniment in four part harmony. Quietly. And at the end there was one of those pauses which says that ‘something happened’
The second I was ready for but it still caught me. Peter goes out and weeps bitterly and so do I. It’s the story of the person whose reality couldn’t match their aspirations. Or to bring it closer to me .. the person who thought they could fly but who crashed to earth.
The third was last night’s Easter Vigil. I’ve been with our congregations in Auchterarder and Muthill this week, rediscovering my soul as a parish priest. Darkened church .. Paschal Candle .. story of God’s faithfulness read by faithful people in the timelessness of semi-darkness. Its the story of hope gradually emerging from despair – the triumph of soul over mind. We hugged each other at the end and went home.